Saturday, 11 February 2012

50+-I'm Not Old!!!

50+ I'M NOT OLD!!

As an old friend- and by old l mean some one l have known as a friend for a long time - turns 50.  I am reminded that l myself turned this half century milestone just last year.  But l'm not old, l an not even mentally 50.

But physically thats another story, going from crouching on my knees to do something to standing, l have to push myself up to stooping, holding onto heavy objects preferably for leverance!!

I do not have the strength to unscrew jars, use a screwdriver to any benefit. I no longer have the energy to walk fast, nor the stamina to walk for hours on end or other such strenuous activities.  I do not have the patience nor understanding to deal with young children/ teenagers like l did when l raised my own four.

My memory lapses over minor things like thingy bobs name and  did you say tea or coffee, and was that 1 or 2 sugars.  Yet my genealogist brain remembrs my 100 times great grand parents with precision.

But l'm not old.

In fact l was most insulted when l read an email newsletter just the other day (  with 50 tips for the 50+ age group, how to save money, how to get financial help etc as "you are a 50+ person" and then it dawned on me that l - yes me was approaching my 51st birthday- oh buggar so l am a 50+ person.

Its official l am one of the "older generation"- heading towards being an "elderly" citizen and "OAP".!!

That can not be, l am a Westlife fan, l go to their concerts and scream and shout and wave my arms about. I'm not old.

I'm not dignified, conservative and proper.

Uhm- but l am 50+ maybe l'm just in denial, maybe its just the trunk of my body thats 50+, my brains not.  I mean l know "things" are going south but there are older things going north, like my discoloured, swollen ankles, my blue veins like maps travelling up my heavy thighs, up to the over hang that is the southerly part of my 50+ body to the merging breasts, once pert and voluptuous now an extension of the over hung buddha belly of the 50+ body!

The 50+ body even changes colour- from white, natural blonde hair to an old dull grey non descript colour which has to be diguised on a regular basis.  Then- yes theres more- large brown freckles appear over night on your hands known as -age spots!! 

When you're a teenager you have common and garden pussie red zits! - when you're 50+ you get 'age spots' and 'skin tags', that unlike said red inflamed spots, form brown permanent attachments to your hands, face and body.

And of course theres your eyes they get old and need 'help'- glasses and your ears, you dont quite hear those sarcy remarks from teenagers anymore- not that you ever did this of course- you need 'help' with 'hearing aids' which you can use selectively!!

You laugh at the programmes "Grumpy Old Women/ Men"  because actually you can so relate to everything they talk about- its not even taking the mickey - its fact and you 50+ you agree with it all, because thats how you now see life.

But l'm not old- perish the thought..........However  if l can get discount and help to live an easier life because l am 50+ then bring it on. Would be rude to refuse, wouldn't it?

1 comment:

  1. Bring on those discounts, is all I can say...:-) I keep asking that woman in the mirror what she did with me but she just smirks and grins. Love the post.